Survival Of The Dead

This George A. Romero film opens with a group of AWOL National Guardsmen robbing the heroes of the previous zombie film made by Romero,  Diary Of The Dead.  (I tried watching that one, but I had a hard time watching it due to it being shown from the cameraman's point of view.  I'll try again soon to watch it so I can review it.)  Anyway, while all of this is going on, on a small island off the eastern coast of Delaware is a small island.  This island is mostly over-run with zombies.  But, there are two Irish families left unharmed.  One family is set on killing the zombies.  While the other family has decided to train the zombies to do the jobs they had before the virus spread.  For example, the mailman zombie still delivers the mail.  This is the main theme of the movie.  These two families hate each other, and can't agree on what to do with the zombies.  Later the soldiers meet up with the leader of the family killing the zombies.  They arrive back at the island and a lame fight ensues.  Eventually, the family saving the zombies captures the other family and the soldiers.  The soldiers and their friends are being held (without restraint) on a farm.  They are being forced to watch a female zombie and a horse in a corral.  Everyone is waiting to see of the zombie will eat the horse.  Instead she decides to ride the horse.  Because of that, a fight breaks out, and everyone is bitten and becomes a zombie.  The movie ends with the fathers from the two families (who are now zombies) chasing each other with unloaded guns.


This movie sucked.  It probably ties as the worst zombie movie ever. On a scale of 1 to to 10, this film gets a well deserved 1.  Don't waste your time with this one.

28 Days Later

This was a really good movie.  It had a few flaws here and there, but overall, it was a good movie.  Anyway, the movie opens with an animal testing facility gets broken into, a few infected chimpanzees escape.... and well, you know how this turns out.  28 days after the chimps bite the first human, (hence the name of the movie,) a bicycle delivery guy wakes up from a coma to find all of London deserted.  He meets up with a small group of survivors.  They fill him in everything that happen during his coma.  After a few days, they come across a group of soldiers who take the women in their group.  Instead of having sex with the women, (I assume it's been awhile.) they force them to put on a fashion show.  THAT may have been probably the second dumbest thing in a zombie movie.  For the dumbest thing ever, refer to my review of Bloodlust Zombies.  Sometime after the fashion show, the soldiers reveal that they have been keeping an infected soldier for observation.  It's later revealed that the zombies will eventually starve to death.  I really liked this idea.  The thought that the zombies will starve to death once all of the survivors are gone... good stuff. I didn't love this movie.  But, I didn't hate it either.  Because of the British accents, I didn't like it as much as I want to.  So, on a scale of 1 to 10, this movie gets a reluctant 8.  I wanted to give this movie a 5, but that wouldn't be fair.

Day Of The Dead

The third Ving Rhames zombie flick on this blog comes up for review today.  Maybe Vingh should be named Godfather Of All Zombies.  BUT, this is a George A. Romero remake.  Anyway, this one centers on a small town in Colorado facing a strange Flu outbreak.  The locals aren't allowed to leave town.  The hospital is over crowded with sick people.  One of the female soldiers is from the town.  She feels a personal responsibility to the people of her hometown.  After arriving, she takes a lower ranking solder with her to visit her mother.  Keep in mind that he has a secret crush on her.  When they arrive at the mother's house, they discover that her mom is sick and they take her to the hospital.  While there, the sick people start to turn into zombies.  But not the normal zombies that you and I expect when you watch zombie movie.  These zombies move REALLY, REALLY fast.  They can climb walls and ceilings.  Anyway, a small group of soldiers fight their way out of the hospital.  They decide to leave the town.  During the fight, the young soldier is bitten.  He eventually turns into a zombie.  BUT, he refuses to bite anyone due to his secret love for his commanding officer!  Throughout the film the zombie soldier still follows orders.  Near the end of the movie the group flees to a secret army base.  There they find Army scientist working on a cure.  But, the virus has spread to the base.  The smartest scientist becomes infected.  Now, the group must work to outsmart a genius zombie.  When all hope seems lost for the group, the love struck zombie soldier fights back against all of the other zombies to save the humans.  He pays the ultimate sacrifice.  The virus and all of the zombies are defeated.  Shortly before or after the credits roll,  (I can't remember which) we learn that one zombie survived.  This is a perfect set-up to explain what happens before Dawn Of The Dead actually starts.  Pretend that this one was made before Dawn Of The Dead.  Anyway, because it links easily with Dawn Of The Dead, and D.O.D. is one of my favorite movies, I'll give this one a 5 out of 10.  Smart, super strong zombies aren't my thing.  That's what brings the rating down.  If it weren't for that, it may have gotten a 9 or a even a 10.

Bloodlust Zombies

The movie opens with some sort of conference call about a completed project by some corporation who after a big biological break, developed a chemical that will help win the “war”. I assume this means the war on terror that is currently going on in Iraq.  They make it a point to party in the office for a job well done. Keep in mind that this all going on after hours.  Two lab technicians have been testing this virus on stray cats.  After a very cheesy, very drawn out sex scene, the two careless lab technicians break the container in which the cat falls out and proceeds to bite an employee, which then leads to the complex locking itself up after the disaster. 

Turns out the “virus” the company was making was going to be used to turn the enemy against each other with pure hatred! Being a fan of zombie movies, I have many issues with this movie.  Only a few people bitten by the zombies re-animate.  There is no explanation given.  The humans are capable of killing the zombies with a gunshot to the stomach or a stab wound to the chest.  My question to the film makers is this:  If nobody turns into a zombie after being bitten by a zombie, then why are the even zombies in the first place?!?!   The acting in this movie was terrible.  I can over look that.  But, there were so many bad things in this movie.  There were topless female zombies seducing the men.  This has to be the dumbest thing ever in a zombie movie.  The acting was bad, and the jokes were bad.  Some of the zombies walked around flinging their arms and legs.  One character kept drinking from a glass that was clearly empty.  This movie is a joke.  Not a good joke.  More like a "we're laughing at you, not with you" joke. 

Let’s talk about the positive aspects of the film.... let me think..... I got nothing.

As to what makes this movie bad far outweighs what makes this movie good.  The inclusion of a porn star makes the statement that this film will be about sex and nudity.  And, it is.  The heroin, Alexis Texas kills two zombies.  Shortly after her first kill, she has the need to wipe the undead blood off of her.  I can understand that.  She just killed her zombified boyfriend.  She's covered in his blood.  But to go on for ten minutes watching her strip down and wash the blood off of her naked body got old.  I'm not gay.  I just didn't see the point.  

Stay away from this one people.  This movie was flat out stupid.  Bloodlust Zombies feels more like a porno without the porn, as if it had been edited for late night T.V.  On a scale of 1 to 10, this movie gets a very generous 1.

Humans VS Zombies

A big part of this movie's plot includes a game that's played on many college campuses all across the country.  This is where the movies gets it's name.  The movie begins with college students on summer break are exposed to a deadly virus that turns people into zombies.  The zombie horde grows and spreads throughout the community. During all the chaos, a campus security guard, obsessed with conspiracy theories, leads a group of students to safety as they and a small band of uninfected people set out to find other human survivors in an attempt to discover the source of the virus and save the world.

The overall production quality of this movie was pretty bad.  But, it didn't affect the quality of the movie itself.  I really like the idea that the United States military has exposed it's soldiers to chemicals that make them immune to the virus.  Despite the low production quality, and sometimes poor acting,  I'd give this movie a solid 9.  It was filmed in Pittsburg, TX.  Anything from the great state of Texas has to be good.

www.humansvszombies.org

Aaah! Zombies!!

Aaah! Zombies!! was originally released under the title of Wasting Away.  This is another horror/ comedy movie.  It's considered unique in that the events of the plot took place from the zombies' point of view.  A group of friends become infected with the zombie virus when they accidentally mix ice cream & beer with a gooey green fluid from a barrel that they found. The teens are unaware that they have become zombies.  They don't understand why people tend to flee at the sight of them.  Probably the funniest part was watching two zombies make out.  Besides, zombies are people too.  And, when you think about it, all the zombies want is to be left alone.  Anyway, on a scale of 1 to 10, this movie gets a 7.  It was pretty funny.  I like the new take on zombies.  There was room for improvement.  But, it wasn't the worst movie ever made.  Besides, it was released on my wedding anniversary.  That alone is worth at least one extra point.

Click here to watch the full movie.

2012 Zombie Apocalypse

The film begins in June 2011 when the VM2 begins to spread.  Soon, 83% of the European population was infected. The virus becomes a global pandemic as it eventually reaches Japan and the United States. Months later, after the zombie plague has wiped out ninety percent of the US population, a small group of survivors fight their way across the United States to a rumored refuge on the island of Catalina.  

This is another Ving Rhames zombie flick.  He plays the typical bad dude that he usually plays.  If you can get past seeing the same 4 or 5 zombies appearing over and over randomly through out the movie, overall it's not a bad movie.  The idea that "I always go for the arrows.  Nobody takes the arrows when they raid a sporting goods store." is actually a really great idea.  Some of the special effects are lame. but again, it's not a bad movie.  In fact, on a scale of 1 to 10, I'd give this movie a high 7. Maybe a low 8.

Zombieland

The first rule of Zombieland: Cardio. When the zombie outbreak first hit, the first to go, for obvious reasons... were the fatties.  Well, in the event of a zombie apocalypse I guess that means I'm dead. Or undead.

Take notes next time you watch this movie.  ALL of the rules make sense.  This movie is a very different take on the genre. It's a comedy/ horror film set two months after Mad Cow Disease turns the population of our planet into flesh eating zombies.

This film has a great cast, a great soundtrack, everything about this movie was awesome. I've seen it a hundred times over.  Bill Murray makes a great cameo. Talk about going to the "tippy top of the A list".  This again, is one I recommend you see.  If you haven't seen it, you MUST see this movie.  If you have, see it again. On a scale of 1 to 10, this movie get s a 10.  By the way, stock up on Twinkies now, while you still can.

Dawn Of The Dead (2004)

This is the George A. Romero remake by Zack Snyder.  This is probably the best zombie movie ever made.  An unexplained outbreak, a group of survivors that really don't like each other trapped in a mall.  The survivors pass the time with shooting contests.  One person looks through binoculars and picks a specific zombie to kill.  The shooter has to kill that specific zombie in one shot.  Good stuff.  THIS is what zombie movies are supposed to be like.  Zack Snyder did everything this right in this one.  There were no zombies shooting guns.  The car crash at the beginning of the movie was very cool.  A few years after the movie came out, Jake Weber's character on Medium joked about how lame this movie was.  You gotta love the inside jokes Hollywood makes.  The cast was great. By the way, this is one of many Ving Rhames zombie movies. The soundtrack was awesome: Johnny Cash's "When The Man Comes Around" to open the movie was perfect.  Later, Disturbed's "Down With The Sickness" was covered by Richard Cheese.  I'm not really sure where to go from here. It was a great movie. If you haven't seen it yet, rent it.  If you have seen it, see it again. This movie gets a solid 10.

Land Of The Dead

Here's the first of many George A. Romero movies you'll find on this blog.  The movie takes place in a city that has become a sanctuary from the zombie apocalypse.  Three of the city's borders are rivers, and the fourth is an electric fence.

The main theme of the movie centers on a group of rich people and their leader that built the city.  Few live in luxury while most live in poverty or worse.  The city employees a group of mercenaries that hunt the zombies and provide food and other supplies to the city.  The top 2 mercenaries end up working against each other.  One works to benefit himself, the other trying to work for himself.  While this is going on, the zombies have banded together to fight the humans.  This is where I kinda lost interest.  The zombies were shooting guns.  I think that this could've been a much better movie. The humans fighting each other over guns, food, and armor during a zombie apocalypse, sounds good. But when the zombies start shooting guns, making Molotov cocktails and etc... Meh.

The cast was actually pretty good.  I guess people want to work for Romero even if they know the movie's gonna suck. Anyway, on a scale of 1 to 10, I'd give this movie a 6