World War Z

PART ONE:
As I write this, I have not yet seen the movie.  But, I have read the book.  I gotta say, I loved the book.  The book was VERY detailed.  The book's setting is ten years after victory is declared in the fight against the zombies.  The writer, Max Brooks tells the story of how he went around the world interviewing the most important people in the war.  There's the story of the doctor who treated Patient Zero, the bodyguard of the stars, the guy that created the "medication" to stop the infection, the humans so desperate to it in that they imitate the zombies, the Russian soldier that has given birth to multiple babies to help re-populate, the woman who has the mind of a child.  There are many awesome stories in this novel.  On a scale of 1 to 10, the book gets a very well deserved 10.

PART TWO:
As I write this section of the review, I have seen the movie starring Brad Pitt.  While it wasn't nearly as good as the book.  It was good.

The infected in the movie were more like people with rabies.  There were alot of cool scenes.  The airplane, the wall, the CDC center.  I could go on.

There were many references to the book which was a good thing.  I won't go into alot of detail about the movie.  Because, chances are, you've seen it.  I highly recommend the book. Check it out.  You won't be disappointed.

Now, down to business.  On a scale of 1 to 10, this one gets a 6.  That's being generous.  Again, the infected weren't zombies.  They had a rabies type of virus.  And, as you probably know by now, I don't like super fast zombies.  There you have it.  Our first Book\Movie Review.

The Oath

After last season's Webisodes, I was really excited to see what new character might be revealed.

You might remember that the first set of Webisodes were ALMOST linked to the soldier in the tank from season 1.  But, instead they revealed how the bicycle zombie came to be.

The second set of webisodes involved a man named Chase that was looking for his sister.  There were many rumors circling around that Chase is Lori's brother.  That may or may not be the case.  Maybe we'll find out....

Now, onto the third set of webisodes.  The Oath is centered around the last two survivors of a group that was overrun in the middle of the night.  They had trained and practiced for that. But, when it actually happened, nobody was ready.

Paul & Karina (the survivors) find a car and a gun the next morning.  This is where we learn that Paul was by broken glass during the horde's attack.  Shortly after getting in the car, Paul's condition worsens.  All Karina wants to do is drive to a hospital.  She still has hope that there's still doctors out there.

This is where I'm gonna give away a little bit of the story:  It's still early in the outbreak.  You might even say that this entire webisode series happened during a season 1 commercial break.

Anyway, Karina finally finds a place to take Paul.  She finds a doctor that stayed behind because she felt it was her duty to help everyone she could.  But, Paul takes a turn for the worse.  His vitals are almost non-existent.  The doctor decides that the only thing she can do is to remove Paul before he turns.

While Karina mourns the loss of her last friend, the doctor wheels Paul's stretcher to the hospital's cafeteria.  This is where she's put all the dead people before they have a chance to turn.  Shortly after being locked on the cafeteria with several walkers, Paul awakens strapped to his bed.

Karina tells the doctor that she doesn't want to go on.  She has nobody.  Paul was her last friend.  The doctor offers her a way out, Jack Kevorkian style.  Paul escapes the cafeteria just in time to see Karina die.  After a heated exchange with the doctor, the next scene shows Paul painting the cafeteria doors.

On a scale of 1 to 10, this, without a doubt, gets a 10.  Anything associated with this great show gets a 10.  It would have to be REALLY bad to get anything less.

King Of The Zombies

This classic from 1941 is set in 1942 (a big leap) during World War II.  Three men crash land their private plane on a small island in the Caribbean when they run out of fuel after getting lost in a storm.

Quickly, one of the three men becomes convinced that the island is infested with zombies.  Not just any zombies, but zombies that have been trained to be slaves. I'm still not sure how I feel about that part of the film.

After investigating the island, they find a house where a "doctor" is performing tests on his zombies slaves.  The doctor is trying to insert the personalities of the Nazi Army into his zombies.  The zombies eventually turn on the doctor.

This film was actually a big stepping stone for comedic actor  Mantan Moreland.  Moreland had awesome timing in the film.  He really helped with bringing the rating up.

What i didn't like about the film far outweighs what I did like.  I wasn't a big fan of the political undertones.  I really didn't care for the war scenario.  But I guess that's what made the film so popular in the first place.  Anyway, on a scale of 1 to 10 this movie gets a 5.  Four of those points belong to Mantan Moreland.  Good gracious, me! Check it out and let me know what you think.

The Zombie Apocalypse

This little movie that could was made in 2008 on a budget of about $5,000.  To me, that says alot.  It seems now you probably couldn't cover food or fuel on a movie set for five grand.  Anyway, let's get this started...

The movie opens with one man (Miller) being handcuffed and forced to kneel.  Another man rambles on about how he's waited so long to kill Miller.  Then, the man opens a door releasing their test-subjects (the zombies).

In the next scene, we meet Mark and Tom.  They're two college roomates that decide to go out one friday night.  By looking at these two, they must've either become roomies by fate, or they must have known each other for years.  One's a hard partier that could care less about studying, and the other is a hard studying, RPG game playing, medical student.

On the way to the bar, they meet a girl who was bitten by a "homeless man".  After running away from the hobo, the trio make it to the bar.  This is where they first meet Dwight Miller.  Miller's car is broke down, and he needs help.  The girl offers to help fix the car, while the guys just wanna drink.  Miller notices the girl's bite, and he kills her.  Shortly after this happens, the bar is surrounded by zombies.

The rest of the film follows Miller, Tom, Mark, & Raven (another girl they met along the way) as they try surviving the end of the world.

This movie was filled with bad acting (the bouncer in the bar takes the prize), poor special effects, and some bad comedic timing.  All that aside, I give this one a 4 on a scale of 1 to 10.  I found out after I watched this movie, that there is a prequel comic book that explains Miller's story, and the possibility that his wife started the Zombie Apocalypse. Too bad that couldn't have been added to the movie.  Maybe if they'd cut out alot of the poor attempts at comedy, they would have been able to add that in.

Warm Bodies

Any preconceived notions you have about zombies and zombie films need to be forgotten while you watch this one.

The movie starts out with R walking through an airport terminal.  R likes to play a game where he basically makes up a back story to all of the other zombies he encounters each day.  During this we pretty much learn who R is, who is best friend, M is, and what the Bonies are.  We'll talk about the Bonies in a minute.  R and M can't remember their own names, much less talk.  So, their conversations go like this: "Ugh"  "Mmmm" "Ehhh"

The Bonies are the zombies that are too far gone.  These zombies can't process thought or really do anything except eat anything with a beating heart.  Keep that in mind.

One day, R and the others decide to go out and  look for a meal.  They have to travel in packs because everyone wants to shoot them in the head.  They come across a group of young scavengers from a group of survivors.  These survivors have done pretty well in the 7 years since the world ended.  R and his group attack the survivors.  R eats the brain of one of the men and instantly obtains that guy's memories.  R decides to save his meal's girlfriend.

R and the girl (Julie) spend a few days together and slowly R begins to become human again.  R's interaction with the other zombies spreads the "backwards virus" and the other zombies start to become human again as well.  All of the new beating hearts have given the Bonies new prey.

Reluctantly the survivors team with the zombies to kill off the Bonies.  By the end of the film all of the zombies have come back to life, and are trying to start their lives over again.

Now, down to business.  On a scale of 1 to 10 this one gets a 7.  I was expecting non-stop laughs.  It wasn't what I was expecting, but it was still worth watching.  There were several funny moments, a few good one-liners, and Rob Corddry as M was cool. That dude makes me laugh.  It wasn't great, but it was still pretty good.

Autumn

This one starts off showing a school classroom. One kid starts coughing, the next minute they're all coughing. Soon, the whole school is infected.  The first few opening minutes show how the world has become infected.  A very cool car crash scene follows that.  Soon, billions die within hours.  Kinda makes ya think. 

Soon, we meet a group of survivors.  The group is in hiding not knowing what to think.  A few days later, the dead begin to rise.  But, they seem to be deaf, blind, and can barely move.  Weeks later, the undead become a threat.  They're attracted to color, sounds, and can run really fast.  So, the survivors come up with a plan: Be quiet.

After lots, and lots, and lots of talking between the final three survivors (the others were too loud).  In one scene towards the end, the dead (who at this time could see, hear, and were basically hunting down humans) had surrounded the farmhouse our three survivors were in.  Then, one of the survivors just opens the front door, runs right into the thick of them, and escapes.  VERY disappointing.  

I like the way this one started, but it didn't take long for this one to go down hill and go fast.  On a scale of 1 to 10, this one gets a 2.

Zombie Apocalypse: Redemption

This one had the look and feel of a cheesey 80s film.  But let's start at the beginning.

There are almost no humans left.  The U.S.A. and the U.S.S.R. have detonated all of their nukes in an effort to kill off all the zombies.  Instead, the zombies now outnumber people 10,000 to 1.

The opening of the film begins with the main character (I can't remember his name) running away from the group he was with.  We learn later on that that group has become a bunch of looters.  They not only loot from abandoned towns, they even take from other survivors.  Anyway, the group is hunting down the guy, when he comes across a smaller group that gels together like a family.  They have small children, a babysitter, a sniper group, and team of looters as well.  The difference is, they don't steal from other groups.

The entire film is about the large group chasing the runaway.  The runaway meets up with the small group, and they hide until they can't run anymore.  There's a big gun battle at the end, and the small group wins.  The End.

There was one scene in this movie that I couldn't believe I was seeing. And for that, this movie will get an extra 3 points.  The scene in question?  The runaway is in a grocery store.  He hears a baby cry.  Runaway runs to save the baby.  What he finds is a zombie eating a baby while the mother lay with her stomach ripped open.

Now, the moment nobody has been waiting for... On a scale of 1 to 10, this movie gets a 1.  BUT, with the 3 bonus points, the final result is a 4. By the way, I read another blog somewhere that called this movie more epic than The Walking Dead.

Xombie: Dead On Arrival

This is an animated short film that was first created sometime in 1994.  It was intended for release on the internet as a four or five part mini-series.  I found it edited as a full movie on Netflix.

The movie opens in the distant future with a little girl waking up and not knowing where she is or how she got there.  Quickly, a swarm of the undead are after her.  Enter the movie's hero, Dirge.  He's a xombie.  This is where we learn the difference in zombie and xombie.  The problem is, both words are pronounced the same. Xombies remember who they are.  They know they are dead. Zombies have an irresistible urge to eat human flesh.  Now, you know the difference too.

For safety, Dirge takes the girl (Zoe) to his home. Dirge explains to Zoe that the earth is infested with zombies and that her only hope is to go to the safe zone that was built.  Along the way, the pair stop at a museum.  There they fight a dinosaur, and meet it's owner, another xombie, Nephthys.  She explains that she was a servant to an Egyptian royal.  Nephthys goes on to explain the movie's back story as well.  She even explains that the safe zone is mostly run by robots designed to protect the humans.  If Dirge gets too close, he'll be killed by the robots.

To make a long, boring story short, Dirge and Nephthys take Zoe to the safe zone.  Once they arrive, a herd of zombies chase Zoe.  In an effort to protect Zoe, Dirge does get too close to the robots.  Zoe makes it into the safe zone but Dirge is killed. Maybe.  The movie ended with hints to a sequel.

I was kind of excited to see an animated zombie film.  But one about zombies saving humans, fighting dinosaurs and robots was not what I cared to see.  So, on a scale of 1 to 10, this one gets a well deserved 2.

Dead Heist

How awesome is this movie?  It's still promoted by Myspace.  THAT'S how awesome it is!!

This film is about a group of street pharmacists, AKA drug dealers.  They've decided that they want more out of life.  They want the American Dream.  They want to rob the nation's richest bank.  By the way, this bank is located in a rural town in South Florida where the cops walk around all day due to the lack of excitement.

Anyway, the group goes to their supplier for guns.  After arranging a deal of cash for guns, the plan is put into motion.  The group and the dealer's bodyguard head to Maysville, FL.  I dunno if it's a real town or not, but it's depicted as being very small.

The bodyguard takes a stroll through the town checking things out.  He meets the owner of a Army/Navy type store.  This is where we hear about the mutants that come out once a month.  That's right, once a month.  AND, they migrate south.  AND, they burrow underground.  AND, they crave human blood.  They sound like a cross between vampires and gophers.  But no, they're zombies. Sorta.

After the bank robbery goes wrong, the group and some of the hostages are trapped in the bank.  The gophers...vampires...I uh I mean zombies are outside.  This is where we learn that shooting them in the heart is the only way to kill them.  I know that this is only a movie, and in movies you can do whatever you want.  But, I'm sorry, it's pretty much a rule that zombies can only be killed by destroying the brain.

The director must have told the actors to ad-lib their lines.  That may have been the best part of the whole movie.  The dialogue between the characters seemed real.  It didn't seem fake or forced.  That and the actor that played the body guard, D.J. Naylor.  I think he could be a big time action star.  I tried finding his bio online, but all I could find was that he worked in transportation in two other movies before this one.

On a scale of 1 to 10, this one gets a 4.  Naylor and the ad-libbing brought this rating up.  By the way, Bone Crusher only makes a cameo.  Despite what the promo poster shows, he's only in the movie for a minute or two.

Rammbock

This little film from Germany starts off with Micheal going back to Berlin to see his ex-girlfriend.  Micheal is hoping he can repair their relationship.  Micheal arrives at her apartment only to find a plumber and his apprentice.  Suddenly, the plumber jumps up and tries to bite Micheal.  Micheal and the apprentice (Harper), push the zombie plumber out of the apartment and barricade the door. They look out the window to see that even police officers are trying to bite people.

This film was only an hour long.  The story was slow moving.  But, in a good way.  The special effects were great.  I shortened this review due to the fact that this film was only an hour long.  The lone paragraph above is half the film.  I don't want to give too much away, because something happens to Harper, and he  discovers a new way to fight zombies.  At first I wasn't cool with it, but then I figured that no movie has ever done it before, AND it is possible.

The film does have two flaws. 1. They use sedatives to delay an infected person from turning. I just didn't like that.  2. It's in German with English subtitles.  The film actually scared me.  I looked up Rammbock, and the English translation is battering ram.  When you watch this one, keep that in mind.  The homemade Rammbock saves Micheal & Harper while almost getting them eaten.  On a scale of 1 to 10, this one gets a very solid 9.

Dead Season

This film starts off with a guy narrating.  Basically, he tells us who he is, a paramedic with no friends or family.  He also tells us how he got to where he is, he walked.  Ground zero for this thing started in Pittsburgh.  Elvis (the paramedic) was on duty that day.  He lost a patient.  As he's sitting there putting his supplies back into the ambulance, the patient re-animates.  Thus begins the Zombie Apocalypse!!

The next scene shows Elvis in Miami.  He's talking to a woman (Tweeter) on a Walkie Talkie.  By the extent of their conversation, I assume they do this every night.  Elvis tells the woman that he has a friend that will give them a boat.  Elvis provides shelter for the woman until they can get to the boat.

They finally make it to the boat and sail to a remote island somewhere off the coast of Florida.  Shortly after they reach land, they come across a group of survivors.  This group takes Elvis & Tweeter to a gated community where they live.  After meeting the leader of the group, he decides that Elvis is valuable considering he's a medic.  Tweeter gets to stay because she's with Elvis.  Elvis asks the leader, "What happens when someone isn't allowed to stay?"  The leader tells him, "We'll cross that bridge when we get there."

A few days later, an old man shows up with his infected wife.  A patrol team brings them in.  The wife turns and bites a few people.  The leader is forced to put them all down.  Later, we find out what happens to those that can't stay.  The leader forces Elvis to harvest the old man for organs and food.  Everything in the movie after that revolves around Elvis & Tweeter trying to escape the island.

This one wasn't too bad.  The zombies looked ok.  They didn't look really gory, but they didn't look lame either.  This film was more about the community on the island than the zombies.  I think on a scale of 1 to 10, this one gets a 6.  It wasn't great, but it didn't suck either.

Zombie Women Of Satan

This little British flick revolves around a retired heavy metal singer and a burlesque troupe.  The singer's sister has joined a cult, and the singer wants to rescue her.  The singer decides going on one last tour with the group will help her find her sister.

The movie starts with a performance by the singer and the group. Later you see everyone backstage talking, drinking, snorting, and etc...  The topic comes up about this internet tv show they have to be on the next morning.  The next scene cuts to the hotel they're staying in.  After some very lame Scooby-Doo style run through one door and come out another gags, the group settles in.

This is when we meet the cult group.  This "family" reminded me of a comical version of The Firefly Family.  Here we find out that this family is performing experiments on unsuspecting women.

The next morning, the group travels to a tv studio which also happens to be on a farm.  I'm glad atleast the rock singer knew what was going on.  What dummy would believe they'd be going to a tv studio on a farm?!?!  Anyway, after an an interruption by a member of the cult, the singer spots her sister.  While the group is looking for the singer's sister, the family is trying to hide her and avoid the zombies they've created.

I really didn't like this one.  There was a clown character that looked like he was a fan of ICP.  That didn't bother me though.  What hurt this movie was the bad attempts at comedy.  The clown went off to touch himself a couple of times in the movie.  There was even an extended scene where another character went cross-eyed taking a crap.  Maybe the funniest scene was the zombie in a wheelchair.  So, with all that in mind, I give this film a 3 on a scale of 1 to 10.

Zombie Nation

Well, this one sucked.  Where do I go from there?  The acting was terrible.  The sets looked like the whole thing was filmed in the same building.  Oh, and Zombie Nation... there were five,  that's right count 'em five zombies in the whole movie!!  The movie is basically about a cop that gets his rocks off by murdering women and dumping or burying the bodies wherever he feels like it.  Eventually, the women re-animate due to a voodoo woman casting her spell.  That's pretty much it. I just saved you 81 minutes.  In fact, this film is listed  as # 7 on IMDB's bottom 100 films.
On a scale of 1 to 10, this one gets a 1. But, because I'm in a good mood, I'll close this blog entry by saying something nice about the movie.  The DVD cover looks good.